I was checking my stats over the summer when I noticed an unusual trend in my last 40 hits:
And for one night, Chile was the greatest country in the world:
Once in a while a slew of random countries gets rocked by my site within a period of 100 hits:
This begs the question: How do people manage to find my site? Unless you're my brother or Ghetto (who I consider to be a co-founder, so he doesn't count), I didn't tell you about it. In fact, I specifically told my brother not to advertise this site, because most people are idiots who won't appreciate it, and there's no way in hell I'd have my brother beg them to waste my bandwidth. As soon as I wrote "My Cousin is a Shallow Bitch" however, my brother couldn't resist sticking a link to it in his AIM profile for about a month. At that point I knew that word would inevitably get around, so before it did, I also stuck the link in my profile to see if I could get any entertaining reactions.
Shortly thereafter, I started "Who is Baka-Raptor" to make fun of "friends" who couldn't figure me out.
I also noticed that my website was practically invisible to search engines, so I stuck a few links around the internet to marginally improve my search rankings. Currently, these are a few of my rankings on Google:
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| baka + raptor | 1 | 59,900 |
| Simoun + lesbians + diverging | 3 | 4 |
| "I called it" + pimp + white + suit + tennis | 4 | 184 |
| "I will eat your food" | 19 | 1,630 |
| cousin + shallow + bitch | 86 | 191,000 |
| Naruto + Bullshit | 2 | 197,000 |
| monster + naruto + filler + horrendous | 12 | 95 |
| monster + woman + orphan + cripple + puppy | 1 | 26,000 |
| anime + turducken + lesbians | 18 | 8,520 |
| Bode + Miller + pretentious + asshole | 1 | 42 |
Without perfectly selected search terms, you'll never find this site. Big deal. Maddox's site used to be invisible too. Now he's the #1 ranked result for "huge" + "balls".